Semiquincentennial Movie Project #29: Cloak & Dagger

 

The Semiquincentennial  Movie Project is an ongoing celebration of the 250th anniversary of the founding of the United States. During the course of this project your humble blogger is choosing a movie a week to represent each of the 50 states in the Union, as well as a movie scheduled for 4th of July weekend that will represent the nation's capitol, Washington D.C. The order of the weekly entries will coincide with the order of each state's entry into the fold (although, not necessarily coinciding with the date of their entry into said fold).

 

Week #29: Texas -

 

 

 

The state of Texas was established on Dec. 29, 1845 

Details about Texas:

State bird: mockingbird

State flower: bluebonnet

State tree: pecan

Additional historical trivia:

There is a radio station in Waco who's call letters are WACO. Only one other city in the U.S. has that distinction: WARE in Ware, PA.

The first ever rodeo was hosted in Pecos in 1883.

Texas has the largest and longest-running State Fair in the US.

Maybe not the longest running college rivalry, but the Texas - Oklahoma Red River Rivalry is (probably) the most watched annual football game.  

Dr Pepper was invented in Waco.

The first Six Flags amusement park opened in Texas, so named because at one time or another Texas has been a country under six nations (Spain, France, Mexico, the Republic of Texas, the Conferderate States of America and the USA).

Austin is home to the largest urban bat colony in the US.  

Texas has the largest state capitol building ("Everything is bigger in Texas" is not just hubris).

The King Ranch in Kingsville is larger than the state of Rhode Island. (Again...)

The world's largest set of cowboy boots, 35 ft. tall, stands outside North Star Mall in San Antonio (ditto)

There are 15 states combined that could fit inside Texas' borders (Maybe I'm overdoing it here...) 

The Alamo in San Antonio does NOT have a basement (PeeWee Herman made me add that one...) 

Famous people born in Texas: Willie Nelson (of course), Gene Autry, Beyonce, George Strait, Buddy Holly, Janis Joplin, Lance Armstrong, Nolan Ryan, Rogers Hornsby, Brittney Griner, Drew Brees, Earl Campbell, Vince Young, Larry McMurtry, Steve Martin, Woody Harrelson, Matthew McConaughey, Carol Burnett, Tommy Lee Jones, Sissy Spacek, Dabney Coleman (see movie below), Henry Thomas (again, see movie below) and US Presidents Dwight D. Eisenhower and Lyndon B. Johnson 

Note: You can say I'm overdoing it this time on trivia, but Texas IS my home state, so...

 

 

Cloak & Dagger (1984): 

Growing up is tough. It can be especially tough, as a kid, when your mother is dead and your father is somewhat distracted by being a single parent trying to raise a kid on his own while trying to work a job.

There is a tendency, at least as far as films go, for the kid to dive deep into a fantasy world, with the requisite imaginary friend. At this point in my life I really can't remember if I had any imaginary friends. But then, I had both of my parents still around until I was well into my 50's, and a sister who is still with me. I had a stable childhood, and although I did not have very many real friends that I palled around with, I don't think I would have had to create an imaginary friend to accompany me on my "adventures". And even if I did, I seriously doubt that imaginary friend would have gotten me into the kind of trouble that Jack Flack gets young Davey (Henry Thomas) into.

 

Davey is a typical kid on most levels. He is heavily into video games, and even into role-playing games. I should point out here at this point that I was a product of an era that preceded Dungeons and Dragons and the rest of the RPG games that flooded the childhood experience in the late 70's and early 80's (and even to this day). I might have been attracted to it had I had a different upbringing. Note: In my experience I was well into my 20's before I was ever introduced to actually playing Dungeons and Dragons. Being raised in a fundamentalist Baptist church household, even the mention of the game brought up serious religious problems, because D&D and the like were considered doorways into Satanism. I've since become more enlightened. D&D and the like are just harmless fun. 

I imagine Davey plays D&D, but his primary interest is in spy role-playing. As such, his hero is Jack Flack (Dabney Coleman), a dime store knockoff of a James Bond type spy. Jack is a dead ringer for Davey's father, Hal (also played by Coleman). It seems to me that Jack is the character that Davey wishes his father really was, thus emphasizing the fact that Jack and Hal are played by Coleman. 

 

 

But Davey's obsession with spy games takes a dark turn when his friend, Morris (William Forsythe), sends Davey on a "mission" to the local tech lab, (ostensibly to get him out of Morris hair, I think). 

 

Davey takes his friend, Kim (Christina Negri) with him on this mission, still trying to play out this spy game for what it's worth. Except that Davey runs into a real spy game. Three guys kill off a laboratory worker who, before he dies, passes off a video game cartridge called Cloak & Dagger to Davey, with the mission now being that Davey get the game to the FBI.

 

It turns out that the game cartridge is disguised as a regular copy of a video game, but has some hidden data that the bad guys are looking to get their hands on. Remember this is 1984, so even though they never come right out at say it, the implication is that the hidden data is going to be handed of to enemies of the US (probably the Russians, who were in the middle of the Cold War with the US).

 

The bad guys, who are played by Michael Murphy, Eloy Casados and Tim Rossovich, are unscrupulous, to say the least. They have no intention of letting even a little kid stand in the way of the big payday they are expecting. Much of the film involves these three trying to retrieve the game cartridge and kill off (yes, I said "kill off") Davey. These unscrupulous characters even are trying to take out young Kim. (Ye gods!)

 

Over the course of the film Davey's imaginary friend keeps helping young Davey with "advice" better suited for a real adult spy rather than a youthful wannabee. It's hard to actually like Jack, since his main goal seems to be to stay the course of the spy he is supposed to be without any care or remorse for his young companion. Often he puts young Davey in extreme danger. But his goal of getting the game cartridge away from the bad guys takes precedence over any such trivialities as "child endangerment".

 

But since Jack is a product of Davey's imagination, perhaps all the blame can't be put on Jack. More fault could be handed of to Hal who seems a bit clueless how to raise a kid on his own. And then, since Jack is a carbon copy of Hal in Davey's mind, perhaps Davey is just trying to create his own father figure who is much more adventurous than the dull air traffic controller Hal is.

To his credit, Davey gradually matures on his own, realizing that Jack is not the sort of friend that he really needs.  But, since he does still have to do something about the un-American forces that are determined to win at all costs, he does have to grow up pretty fast. He has to. At one point he is faced with a situation where he has to either kill or be killed.

 

There are a couple of twists that I found extremely interesting in this film. For one thing, the three hoodlums have a backing that was almost unexpected. At least, at the beginning. It may be obvious to you before very long into the film that not everybody in this film is exactly who they seem to be. The surprise may be, however, the actors who played the parts. I bet my sister, who is a fan of old movies, would be shocked that a couple of "good guys" could play evil characters.

Cloak & Dagger was released in the summer of 1984. It was, in fact, released on the same day as Red Dawn, and with competition from such blockbusters as Purple Rain and The Karate Kid, as well as Star Trek III and Revenge of the Nerds, which were (probably) still in the theaters, it probably wasn't going to have much of an impact in the first place. The main reason, it seems, for it's August release, was that the big event was the Summer Olympics, and since most kids would have not been very interested in that event, it was thought that the theater would be pulling a larger crowd of kids.

Unfortunately that didn't happen. It only pulled in about $10 million in box office receipts. And the expected tie-in with the video game fell through when it was only released as an arcade game and was not immediately put out for home use. This despite the fact that the movie hinges on this Atari Cloak & Dagger video game that was supposed to be a release for the home video game market.

 

Henry Thomas, the star of Cloak & Dagger, was just coming off a star making role as the best friend of a creature from another world (E.T.: The Extraterrestrial). His career as a child actor was fairly limited, only appearing in a handful of films, but unlike other child actors of the day, he was able to transition to adult roles later in life. Recently he has appeared in no less than three movies based on stories by Stephen King (Gerald's Game, Doctor Sleep and Pet Semetary: Bloodlines).

Dabney Coleman, who passed away in 2024, had a prolific career. You may remember him as the sexist boss Franklin Hart in 9 to 5, or as the soap opera director in Tootsie. He was the murderer in one of my favorite Columbo movies in 1991 (Columbo and the Murder of a Rock Star). 

Michael Murphy is a familiar face, having appeared in such films as the big screen version of M*A*S*H*, Nashville and Batman Returns, but possibly may be more familiar as a voice. He was the narrator of the PBS series of "American Experience". Tim Rossovich, who started out as a professional athlete in the NFL, often cropped up in film and TV in the late 70's and 80's. 

Christina Nigra may look vaguely familiar. If you saw Twilight Zone: The Movie you may remember her as the annoying little brat who keeps pestering John Lithgow in the "Nightmare  at 20,000 Feet" segment, or possibly as Evie Garland's best friend in the TV series Out of This World.

The cast is rounded out with the appearance of a couple of classic movie and TV stars, John McIntyre and Jeanette Nolan, as an elderly couple who may or may not be on Davey's side in his adventure.  

For pure entertainment, I think Cloak & Dagger is a decent movie, It somehow is able to appeal to both the kid and the "kid at heart" and genuinely holds the viewer's interest, despite a few flaws. 

The MacGuffin of the film seems to be a little flimsy to me; how the video game could hold such detailed information that could only be accessed if you got to a specific level of playing it seems to be a little contrived, at least as far as 1984 technology is concerned. Nowadays it would be child's play to hide info this way, and even the youngest wannabe computer kid could crack it with no effort...

The other thing, although obligatory in a kid-friendly movie, is that the three main bad guys are pretty much incompetent. Any real professional criminals could have pulled off eliminating an 8 year old kid without much problem, but these guys probably couldn't eliminate a snail trapped in a 4" x 4" box... 

The highlight for me is the setting of the film. It takes place in San Antonio, and even though I never visited San Antonio until about 8 years later, it still looked familiar to me. The obligatory scene at the iconic Alamo (you CAN'T set a movie in San Antonio without featuring a scene with the Alamo..) is one of the highlights. (Of course, that HAS to be the place where the hoodlums drop off their illicit contraband).

Give this film a try, if for nothing else to see how Henry Thomas was not just a "flash in the pan" with his star making role in E.T. 

Well, that's it for this time. Drive safely, folks. And leave your imaginary friends behind. They are only going to cause you trouble.

Quiggy

 

 

 

Sometimes Time Creeps Up On You

 

Getting old is not for the squeamish. Or the weak. Or the timid.

What the hell, getting old is not for anybody, really...

I was reading a book on Stephen King films and came across a chapter in it on "needless sequels" to King films (Stephen King Films FAQ by Scott Von Doviak). It should be noted that that disparaging designation "needless sequels" is the author's phrase, not mine. The chapter is titled "Sometimes Dead is Better: A Return to Salem's Lot, Pet Semetary Two and Other Needless Sequels" (Chapter 29 if you have a copy of the book). 

I can't say I disagree with ALL of the selections the author points out in this section. (BTW, he devotes a whole 'nother chapter to the seemingly endless sequels to Children of the Corn, {what are we up to now... Children of the Corn XX...?} so at least he has SOME semblance of decorum...). Personally I never really liked the first Firestarter, so when the Sci-Fi Channel inflicted a sequel with a grown up Charlie on the public I was not one of those who looked forward to it. And several other sequels that have been made to follow (and "sucker in" fans of) better movies have not impressed me, probably more often than not.

Still, in my younger and more impressionable days, there was a sequel that I highly anticipated that did get me. I was a huge fan of the original Creepshow. So when a sequel was announced I was one of the first people in line to buy a ticket on opening day of Creepshow 2. 

While I was reading Von Doviak's book it occurred to me that I hadn't seen Creepshow 2 since it first hit the theaters back in 1987. (That's nearly 40 years! See what I mean about getting old? I feel older just noting that...and I felt just fine before I realized it was 40 years...) 

I have quite a number of King movies in my collection, but this was one I have never run across when I have browsed the stacks of my local used DVD store. I remembered fondly two of the three stories in the film ("Old Chief Wood'nhead" and "The Raft"), but, to be honest, I really didn't remember anything about whatever the third story in the film was until I re-watched it just now. (That one is called "The Hitch-hiker"). 

Von Doviak's main disparaging comment, that the film "creatively...looks like leftovers", seems to be a little harsh to me. The whole concept of the Creepshow series of films (as well as the TV series that followed them) was all about an homage to the old EC comics from the 50's, such as The Vault of Horror and Tales from the Crypt, and many of the comic book stories come off as leftovers if you read the originals. There are a few reprints in book form out there if you are interested in seeking them out.

The stories included in this sequel are just about equal to the ones in the first film, especially the one called "The Raft", which I would take over "The Lonesome Death of Jordy Verrill" from the first film any day...

The three stories in this one come off kind of like a poor man's version of a Twilight Zone episode, complete with a hinted at morality lesson at the end. At least for two of them. (You have to work at getting a morality lesson out of "The Raft", since the only really "bad" thing the teenagers do is smoke a joint... and for that they have to die? If that's the case about 20% or 30% of the population would be slated for morality lessons...)

40 years later I still like Creepshow 2, although the subpar acting on some of the characters does come off a bit ridiculous. None of the kids on the raft are really great, even though I still think it is the better of the three stories.

 

Creepshow 2 (1987): 

It's interesting to note than when the original sequel was conceived, and slated to be done by a major studio, there were actually going to be 5 stories used for this anthology. When New World Pictures took over, the new studio jettisoned two of the stories. Whether either of them would have improved the film is hard to say. I like the idea of an evil bowling league getting revenge, which is one of the ones left out. The other story, called "The Cat from Hell", actually was filmed for an episode of Tales from the Darkside, so we do have that to fall back on.

 

The first segment, "Old Wood'nhead", is probably the least suspenseful and the horror part of the story takes a pretty long time to come to fruition. Before we get to the meat of the horror we are treated to a long introduction to a pair of kindly old souls, Ray (George Kennedy) and Martha (Dorothy Lamour), who run a general store that has seen better days. George does his best to keep the store going because, despite the dwindling economy, the members of the community need him.

 

But there are some bad elements in town. Led by Sam (Holt McCallany) three hoodlums attempt to rob the old couple and ultimately kill them. 

 

Finally, the horror part kicks in as  a wooden cigar store Indian that George is devoted to keeping looking fresh comes to life to exact revenge. (Yes, I said wooden cigar store Indian...) The Indian looks pretty unscary, to be honest, even when it does start to come to life. And I would gladly have exchanged this story for any of the other two that got scuttled. But fortunately the rest of the movie was really good.

 

The second story, "The Raft", involves two pairs of teenagers who are out to spend a day floating on a raft in the middle of a lake. The lake is deserted at this time of year because it is off season for the tourists that would have been around in the summer. (I think this is supposed to be in the fall, after the lake crowd has gone back to their mansions in the city, but it could be early spring... Either way, the teens make a point of noting that the lake is pretty cold.

 

They all get to the raft before they notice a peculiar looking oil slick on the lake. But it's NOT an oil slick... It moves of it's own accord, and it turns out to be some kind of carnivorous being (although it doesn't transform into a giant shark or anything like that, which would have probably detracted from it's scariness..) 

 

It gradually picks off each teenager, one by one, ultimately giving us a lesson in observing surroundings, because at the end of the segment we see a sign, hidden by some bushes, which clearly says "No Swimming"...

Note: To keep this blog on a family friendly level, 

I'm not going to post any pics of the slick taking out the teens. 

Most of it is pretty graphic...  

The third segment, "The Hitch-hiker", really hits that morality tale trope on the head. What we essentially have is a woman, played by Lois Chiles, who is cheating on her husband. (Let this be a lesson to you, whether you are male or female... don't get into any extramarital relationships, or... YOU'LL BE SORRY...!) 

 

As she is trying to get home before her husband gets home from work the woman accidentally hits and kills a hitchhiker on the side of the road. Instead of pulling over, of course, she panics and makes it a case of hit and run. Only the only part of that she seems to get right is the "hit" part, because the "run" part doesn't pan out. The hitchhiker keeps showing up, in more and more beat up condition, saying "Thanks for the ride lady!" (It is somewhat reminiscent of how Griffin Dunne's character keeps showing up to try to get David Naughton to kill himself in An American Werewolf in London.)

 

"The Hitch-hiker" is a pretty cool episode, a bit graphic on occasion, and it called to mind the classic Twilight Zone episode where the woman keeps seeing the same hitchhiker as she is trying to cross the country (although that one has no gory scenes at all...)

My opinion on the second watch of this film is that it was not nearly as good as I remembered, but hardly worth the level of putdown that Von Doviak gave it. A reading of several reviews that I researched for this entry fall in line with my own opinion: a) that it's not all that bad, and b)  most of them agreed that the better of the the three was the middle story.

There is, as was in the first movie, a connecting device involving a young comic book fan, in cartoon form,  who is being harassed by a gang of malcontents. The malcontents, of course, getting their just desserts at the end (or maybe that should be better phrased "becoming just desserts"...) 

 

Unlike the third movie in this cycle, Creepshow 3, this movie still had the King hand in it. All three stories were by the horror master. As I understand it, neither Stephen King or George Romero had anything to to do with #3, and it remains to be seen whether I'll even give it a watch. (Probably I will, but I have a lot on my plate right now... it was an unscheduled halt in other projects that even led me to cover this one... maybe in 2027).

Creepshow 2 made a fairly decent profit, not big, but at $4 million to make it managed to pull in $14 million at the box office. Echoing Von Doviak, it wasn't entirely well received by the critics. It currently only has a 36% approval rating on Rotten Tomatoes. The critical consensus can be summed up with one reviewer who said "[d]espite its strengths -- a livelier pace, some creatively gory set-pieces -- this is a much cheaper-looking effort than its predecessor..." OK, in all fairness Creepshow is WAY better than Creepshow 2, but it's still a fun watch.

Gotta fire up the old Plymouth and head home. Drive safely, folks. And, please, keep your eyes on the road, and stay away from those remote swimming holes.

Quiggy

 

 

 

The Red Planet Menace

 

 

This is my entry in the Classic Literature on Film Blogathon hosted by Silver Screen Classics.

The science fiction world would be a lot smaller without the classic trope of alien invasions.  I am not sure what qualifies as the very first example of "alien invasion" in literature, but wikipedia lists a couple that pre-date the H. G. Wells classic The War of the Worlds. Neither is one I had ever heard of, however. The most intriguing of these antecedents is one titled The Germ Growers by Robert Potter, which I didn't have time to read prior to this post, but the link above looks to have the text. I will give it a go when I have time. The gist seems to be that aliens, who are able to look like humans, are busy trying to grow a fungus that will eliminate the Earth of that pesky infestation of humans so they can take over the planet.

 

The one that the majority of you will have ever come into contact with, however, is the Wells book.

 

Written in 1898, it involves an invasion of Martians on Earth who are seeking better living conditions. As Wells states in his first chapter, Mars has gradually become inhospitable due to the fact that it is a dying planet; "the light and heat it receives from the sun is barely half of that received by this world", he says, and "we know now that even in its equatorial region the midday temperature barely approaches that of our coldest winter."

So, with greedy eyes cast sun-ward to their nearest neighbor, they see a planet that has a better climate and is more conducive to life that they really want. And since the Martians are far more technologically advanced than their neighbors, they have the means necessary to take the planet by force. (Some analysts of the Wells novel think that War of the Worlds is a critical comment on the idea of imperialism; that the higher technologically advanced race has a sort of "God given" right to dominate over a lesser race.)

The first half of the novel involves the coming of the Martians and their unprovoked attack on Earthlings. Being far more superior in firepower it is fairly easy for them to wreak havoc on the natives. It later becomes apparent that the Martians are not going to be satisfied with the elimination of humans; they are also going to harvest them for sustenance.

Eventually, spoiler alert!, the Martians are defeated, not by humans, but by the one thing that the Martians did not count on... common bacteria to which the humans are mostly immune... the common cold!

The problem, when it came to trying to put the classic novel to film, was that technology advanced to a point where, except for being able to traverse the vastness of space in reasonable swiftness, much of the Martian technology that Wells envisioned for his Martians eventually became a reality. For instance, the "death ray" in the novel is not entirely dissimilar to laser technology we have today. And the mechanical tripods that the aliens were able to employ against a "horse and carriage" are like child's play today in a society that now has tanks and jet airplanes, etc.

The first movie to try to make the novel come to life solved the problem by transposing the events from early 1900's to mid 1950's. (It was made in 1953). This is the classic story, more or less, except that, in addition to updating the Earth's technological capabilities and the still more advanced alien technology, the setting is transposed from England to California. While there are plenty of references to the novel, including an introduction that basically echoes the opening of Wells' story, the changes tend to date the movie just as much as the original novel.

 

That's pretty much the downfall, in my opinion, of any of the subsequent attempts. It's still a little early, I admit, to say that the Spielberg version from 2005, starring Tom Cruise, is dated at this point in history, but I feel sure if humanity survives for another 50 years it will look as quaint as the 1953 version does to us today.  

 

Note: as often happens, there was a direct-to-video knockoff that came out the same year starring C. Thomas Howell. And, as much as I loathe Tom Cruise as an actor, I have to admit that the big screen theatrical version is miles ahead, not only in story, but also in special effects. (Those Martian machines in the Howell version just made me "howl" {pun intended})  

 

The thing is, if you film a classic novel in it's original milieu you are much more likely to get a thumbs up from me. As I have stated before, my favorite Sherlock Holmes films are ones that have Holmes firmly entrenched in his gaslight and hansom cab Victorian era setting (the BBC Sherlock is an exception to that feeling). So, it was attractive to me when I came across a British made film that purported to stay true to the original novel. Coincidentally (or maybe not), this version also appeared at the same time as the Spielberg film.

 

The story itself is, to be honest, quite close to the novel. It does take place in the Victorian era. There are several instances where some minor details are changed, but none that really detract from it for a purist point of view. There are several points that do make this a less than stellar output. For one thing, often the special effects look like they were done on a miniscule budget. The aliens in particular, although looking quite a bit like I would envision them by the description that Wells gives them, don't particularly look all that well made. 

 

 

And occasionally one or more of the actors seem like they were just cast because they "looked" the part, without having the necessary acting chops to pull it off. (In particular, I think Jack Clay, who played "Oglivy" was pretty laughable. His IMDb page seems to play that out... this is his only film. Was he he friend of the director or something? To his credit he was an acting teacher... maybe his career as an actor was limited to the stage). 

Recently Amazon Prime released a new version starring Ice Cube. Unfortunately I have not been able to watch it, but it has garnered a slew of disparaging reviews. One reviewer called it "truly morally icky", which you know is enough of an incentive for me to give it it a try someday... It almost completely swept the Razzies for 2025, winning in all the categories for which it was nominated except one. (Ice Cube and his camera lost the Worst Screen Couple award to the seven dwarves in Snow White).

 

If you are looking for great special effects, my opinion is go with the Spielberg version (which had a bigger budget to work with than the 1953 version). If you are looking for great acting. then stick to the 1953 version. I'll take Gene Barry over Tom Cruise any day... But if you'd like to see a version that sticks to it's source material, you can't go wrong with the British version. 

Above all, however, if you have never read the source novel, what are you waiting for? It's a classic.

Well, time to fire up the old Plymouth and head home. If there is still a home to go to. I just saw something flash in the sky over to my East...

Quiggy

 

 

 

Semiquincentennial Movie Peoject #28: Attack of the Giant Leeches

 

 

 

 

 

The Semiquincentennial  Movie Project is an ongoing celebration of the 250th anniversary of the founding of the United States. During the course of this project your humble blogger is choosing a movie a week to represent each of the 50 states in the Union, as well as a movie scheduled for 4th of July weekend that will represent the nation's capitol, Washington D.C. The order of the weekly entries will coincide with the order of each state's entry into the fold (although, not necessarily coinciding with the date of their entry into said fold).

 

 

Week #28: Florida -

 

 

 

The state of Florida was established on Mar. 3, 1845

Details about Florida:

State bird: Northern mockingbird

State flower: orange blossom

State tree: palmetto

Additional historical trivia:

For drive-in fans: In Ft. Lauderdale there is a drive-in theater that has the most screens, with 14 of them. 

Carabelle is noted for having the world's smallest police station. It's a phone booth. 

The oldest continuously settled community in the U.S. is located in Augustine.

If you love golf, there are more golf courses in Florida than any other state. (Makes sense).

For fans of one of my favorite T.V. shows, In Search Of, Florida is home to Coral Castle. This structure was supposedly built by one man, and has some stones that weigh tons. 

Famous people born in Florida: Tom Petty, Jim Morrison (lead singer of the Doors), Ronnie, Johnny and Donnie Van Zant, (brothers who fronted Lynyrd Skynyrd and 38 Special), Sidney Poitier, Wesley Snipes, Matthew Stafford, Deion Sanders, Janet Reno and Marco Rubio.  

 

 

 

 

 

 Attack of the Giant Leeches (1959): 

 

First thought: This movie should probably have been called Attack of the Giant Trash Bags. Of all the movies I have ever seen in my life, (and believe me I have seen a LOT!) these monsters are probably some of the most laughable (and that's even considering A*P*E*...).  There is some interesting background to this, however. Roger Corman, always on the lookout to cut the budget down to the bare bones, had the guys who played the monsters design their own costumes. Zip! Why pay a costume designer when you can just get the actors, who you already are paying, to do the job for you?

Attack of the Giant Leeches was made for about $70. (Just kidding! It was actually made for about $70,000, but it LOOKS like it was made cheaper...)  

It was directed by Corman stalwart Bernard L. Kowalski, who had more success as a TV director. He directed some episodes of Columbo, as well as episodes of Magnum P.I., Knight Rider, Baretta and Jake and the Fatman. This was his third big screen effort. He had previously directed Hot Car Girl and Night of the Blood Beast, both for Corman's AIP studios.  This one was originally released as a double feature with A Bucket of Blood. 

 

The movie starts out slam bang as a local poacher in the swamps fires upon a creature he sees. He pumps several bullets into it, but when he tells the locals, no one is able to find the body, so they assume the guy was drunk, and probably just shot an an oversized alligator. (All back country characters in these movies are alcoholics, did you ever notice that...?)

 

Apparently these mysterious creatures living in the swamp have resentment issues, because the guy turns up dead not long after.

The local game warden, Steve (Ken Clark) is of a mind that the culprit is a renegade alligator and goes out looking for it with his girlfriend, Nan (Jan Shepard), but comes up empty. Meanwhile the mysterious predator, (it is still assumed that there is only one), continues to ravage unlucky souls who find themselves in the swamp at the wrong time. Only the rest of the victims keep disappearing, as far as the local constabulary is concerned.

 

 

Steve thinks this "gator" is dragging it's victims underwater to some hideaway. The local sheriff (Gene Roth) wants to set off some dynamite charges to try to uncover the missing bodies, and hopefully kill the "gator" in the process. but Steve is adamant about preserving the pristine swamp and thinks that dynamite might damage the environment.

 

The next victims to fall prey to the creatures are the wife of Dave (Bruno VeSota), a local storekeeper, and her secret lover. See, Liz (Yvette Vickers) is the essence of a tramp. She has been cheating on Dave with his best friend, Cal (Michael Emmett). And you just know these two sinners are going to get what they deserve... Although maybe not the way that one would expect.

 

Dave figures out that Liz is cheating on him and goes looking for her and finds her in  flagrante delicto with Cal. He is going to shoot them both, apparently, and Cal, being the cad that he is, tries to pin the blame all on Liz. Dave chases Liz and Cal through the swamp, and when he finally corners them near the water's edge he gets his revenge in an unexpected way as one of the creatures shows up.

No one believes Dave when he tells of seeing the creature, however. They assume, with reasonable assurity,  that Dave killed them both and dumped the bodies in the swamp. This eventually leads to a couple of locals going out into the swamp hoping to find the bodies and get some reward money. And, no spoiler alert, they become victims themselves to the creatures. 

Eventually Steve works out that the creatures are leeches, somehow transformed into giant size due to all that nuclear activity that is being done nearby. (Of course it's "nuclear radiation"... what other guilty party could be blamed in a 50's monster movie...?)

At one point the sheriff decides, on his own, to go against the advice of Steve and set off dynamite charges. And most of the bodies end up floating to the surface. Steve and a friend go underwater looking for the leeches and a battle occurs and eventually (maybe) the creatures are defeated.

 

One has to wonder: Are there only two of the leeches that were affected by the radiation? That's all we see. The movie ends, as usual, on a happy note that the threat has been vanquished, but I couldn't help but think: the swamp appears to be devoid of any creatures other than the leeches. It is never stated outright, but I think you are supposed to decide the leeches eliminated the other swamp denizens like the alligators. Did these two do all that all by themselves?

As noted above, don't go into this movie expecting some horrific monsters. Often those creatures look exactly like what they are in real life, just a couple of guys in decorated trash bags. The acting is not exactly top notch, either. Yvette Vickers, despite the fact that she is playing a stereotypical backwaters tramp, is about the best part of it. (And, yes, I am giving her some points for a scene of her in a bathing suit...)

At only 60 minutes in length, it won't use up too much of your time to give it a go. Admittedly there seems to be a few scenes where they are padding the scene and extending sequences just to get the movie up to a full hour. The scene where Dave chases Liz and Cal in particular takes up about 5 or 6 more minutes than might be necessary, and you can't help but wonder why the two couldn't put more distance between them and their pursuer. Especially since Dave has to stop every now and then to fire off his rifle or reload it.

I disparaged Teenage Zombies way back at the beginning of my movie review blogging for it's obvious efforts to pad a 45 minute TV show into a full length feature film, so I would be disingenuous if I didn't do the same here. But Giant Leeches has a phenomenally better acting output. (If you've watched Teenage Zombies, you know that's not hard to accomplish, but be that as it may).

So the end result is that Attack of the Giant Leeches is worth a watch if you appreciate cheesy low budget schlock like I do. Just don't go into it expecting Godzilla, or for that matter, The Horror of Party Beach. I think it's better to watch it for the unintentionally funny stuff than it is for its strictly horror output.

 

Drive safely, folks. Especially if you have to cross a swamp on the way home.

Quiggy