Hillbilly Hamlet

 

 

The following is a guest post by my friend Jim Bob Turner: I made a few editorial notes, but it's mostly his thoughts. For the most part you should be able to figure out to what or whom he is referring without my help. -Quiggy

 

 

Hamlet (1948):

OK, so my buddy Quiggy said he was tryin' to "expand my whore risin's". Hey! He said it, not me... and where them "whores" was in this movie, I can't say. I sure didn't see any...

But anyways, I'm good buddies with him, so I sat down an' watched this here movie on his say so. It was about some guy, I think he was called Hambone, or something like that. "Hambone". Sounds like my kind of guy, I'm going in thinking maybe this guy an' me could get together and share some good recipes. He might even have a good recipe for fried possum...

 

Anyways, the movie starts off with some guy saying that this is the "story of a man who could not make up his own mind...", and right away I'm thinking maybe this guy he's talkin' about tips the jug a little too much.  I get the same way, especially when I've drunk a little too much of cousin Cletus' moonshine. Cletus may not be able to add two and two together and come anywheres close to 5, but he does make a pretty mean batch of mountain dew...

I should point out at the start that this Hambone character comes from some play from about 1000 years ago. I think it was a play that Miz Winfred wanted us to read for English class back in my high school days. It was writtened by some guy named William Shake A Spear. I didn't read it, of course. I got the class nerd to help. It might actually have been my friend, Quiggy (ed. note: it wasn't me... I didn't meet Jim Bob until after high school). He gave me a quick 5 minute sum up. I didn't think I missed much.

 

So, anyway, the movie starts out with some guys who are guards on a balcony and they are talking about one of them claiming that he seen this ghost of the old king, who later turns out to have been Hambone's daddy. See, some time before this point, Hambone's daddy had died. His uncle, Claude, ended up marryin' Hambone's mother and now his uncle is his stepdaddy. Sounds like normal to me... what's the big deal...?

 

I guess Hambone didn't take to kindly to his uncle Claude becomin' his new daddy. He seems to think there's sumpin' fishy going on in Denmark, which is home country. Hey, "sumpin's fishy in Denmark"! I think I came up with a new phrase! I like that better'n the line in the movie... (ed. note: Jim Bob is referring to the line in the play/movie "something is rotten in Denmark." I have to admit I like Jim Bob's line better myself. too.) 

Hambone seems to be so glum about the whole situation that I think he's even thinking about suicide. I think that's the whole point behind that earlier dig at him, when the guy says the movie is about a guy who can't "make up his mind.." At one point Hambone even has an argument with hisself, tryin' to decide whether or not to drink the kool-aid. (ed. note: Jim Bob is referring to that famous piece known as "Hamlet's Soliloquy".)

So the guards decide they gotta tell Hambone what they seen. An' Hambone, thinkin' he's just gotta see for hisself, goes with them to the next guard watch. Hey, gotta give ol' Hambone some credit for having guts. You wouldn'a got me up on that balcony... There he meets up with ghost daddy and his daddy tells him the truth of what happened. Hambone's daddy, the former king, had no name in this picture, or I guess in the Shake A Spear play either. Leading me to ask that one question... hey, Hambone...who's your daddy?

Hambone learns of the truth behind daddy's death from the ghost. It turns out that Claude dumped some poison into Hambone's daddy's ear and killed him. Hambone decides that the best thing for him to do is to somehow prove that Claude is a bad guy. He decides he is gonna try to act like he's gone crazy. Hambone missed his calling. He shoulda been a stage actor, because he manages to pull off this play acting. 

 

At least he does as far as his mommy, Gertie, and his girlfriend, Filly, is concerned. 

 

But Claude suspects that Hambone may not be as crazy as he's puttin' on to be. Watch out, Hambone. Any guy that would kill his own brother is not a guy you wanna even play lawn darts with, much less try to trick. 

 

Claude gets his advisor, Possum to spy on Hambone. Possum thinks Hambone may not be faking it however. But he thinks the madness might have something to do with Filly, who as it turns out, is Possum's daughter. Hambone continues to play the part even when he thinks no one else is watchin', so he convinces Filly that he's done lost it, too.

 

But wily old Hambone, he ain't done yet. He gets a band of wandering actors to put on a play for Claude, but he gets them to change part of the usual play by puttin' in a scene that includes the same evil deed that Claude pulled on his daddy, hoping that Claude's guilty conscience will get the better of him. But when it comes down to it, Claude starts to pray for forgiveness and Hambone, who was gonna kill him, decides that he can't go through with it. Not because he himself has some kind of change of heart; he's just worried that Claude will be forgiven and let into Heaven, and Hambone wants him to go the other direction. (You gotta appreciate such focus on gettin' revenge).

The story gets a little more twisted as it goes on. Claude sends Hambone to Limey country (ed. note: He means England.) The plan is that some friends that Claude has will kill Hambone while he's there and keep Hambone outta his hair. But Hambone and his ship get attacked by pirates. I just thought of a movie I watched years ago where this kid says "Gettin' killed by pirates is good..." But Hambone don't get killed by them pirates. He gets returned to Denmark. And I guess Claude is startin' think what's a guy gotta do to get rid of his enemies... 

I forgot to point out that at one point Hambone accidentally killed Possum. Torn up by the death of her father, and the fact that Hambone seems to have lost his hold on being sane, Filly killed herself by jumping in a pond and drowning. Filly had a brother, Larry, who had shown up after his daddy's death and wants revenge. So Claude and Larry arrange a good ol' fashioned duel. My buddies over in Kentucky, the McCoys, woulda been proud. Them lowdown Hatfields would have deserved the same kind of showdown.

There's some sneaky little goings on involving fixin' up a sword with poison so that when Larry nicks Hambone he is gonna die toot sweet. All'n' of the bad guys gets their come uppance in the end. Too bad Hambone is one of them. I kinda liked him. Now I'll never get his recipe for pork chitlins...

 

Quiggy: Well, thanks Jim Bob. 

Hope you folks enjoyed Jim Bob's foray (actually mine, just in case you are slow on the updraw...) into the artistic world.

And, BTW, if you'd like another angle on Hamlet, check out Renaissance Man. As with my review of that movie, this one is dedicated to Rachel of Hamlette's Soliloquy, who I hope likes this take on her favorite Shakespeare play.

Drive safely, folks.